TOGETHER utilizes the safe cycle to help with conflict management. We help you Stabilize the situation. Once calming and safety is in place, the people in conflict can be helped to reach an Agreement. A decision on how to move Forward from where they were leads to peace and even Enjoyment again.
Safe Cycle verses the unsafe cycle:
CONFLICT → Stabilize →Agreement → Forward → Enjoy
CONFLICT → Chaos →Disagreement →Stuck → Misery
- Four phases from conflict to peace
I got a call on a Tuesday morning with a request for help. Keith, I need help, there is no more time.
The plane was leaving early on Wednesday morning. Tickets were purchased, the products were made, the events planned, the local hosts were expecting the arrival with great anticipation!
There was a problem. The star of the show had decided not to go.
The impasse was about to jeopardize months of planning and thousands of dollars to be lost in upfront expenses for the event.
I immediately changed my schedule for the day and went to work. I was energized by the challenge. The urgency, the high stakes of the decisions that needed to be made within the next few hours were a stimulus for action.
I am a mediator. At the most basic level of definition, mediation is facilitated negotiation. I help two or more “parties” (people) have a conversation that ultimately reaches a mutually agreed upon settlement. I do not have to be an expert on the subject in dispute. I rely on the process I know very well to help people move from being stuck to collaborative action toward a solution.
A few phone calls, a two-hour mediation meeting and it was solved. It can be that simple.
If you have conflict, or know of someone who does, remember to have them give me a chance to help before additional hurt or legal proceedings occur.
What happens when a tube of paste gets squeezed?
Answer: What is inside comes out.
When I am under pressure, when I feel the squeeze then I let what is inside me out. It is easy for me. I can easily release the feelings I have for all to know. I share my thoughts, my opinions, my perspectives. They flow out for all to see, hear and know.
Am I bragging. Hardly. I am confessing. My ability to ‘let it all out’ is not always the best way to deal with pressure. I am what is sometimes called, a “Hurler”. That is the opposite of those “Hiders”, who hold it all in, even when the pressure is applied strong; like a plugged up tube. But a gushing flow out is not necessarily the best thing to hear.
It really depends on what is coming out — which is really the point of the question I asked earlier. When the pressure is on you does a sweet response, a gentle answer, words spoken that are helpful to those who hear come out? Or something else; something mean, ugly, rude, cutting, or hurtful?
It may be too personal to share what your normal, under pressure response is, but what do you think will help a person have a positive outcome when the pressure is intense on them?